Archive for the ‘Houston’ Category

I’m just a busy beaver these days, folks.  And I’m afraid I’ve all but abandoned this little blog…for now.

In the meantime, keep up with my food writing here: she eats.

And keep up with my Houston sports/news/arts/entertainment writing here:  Houstonist.


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I guess I can say that at least one small thing I’ve written over the years has been officially published…

The Houston: It’s Worth It book hit the shelves back in October 2007 and — like the bad procrastinator I’ve been lately — I haven’t even bothered to check it out yet, even though I hear it’s phenomenal.

As chance would have it, I was perusing a favorite website today — Houston Strategies — and saw that Tory Gattis had done a brief write-up on the HIWI book and included a few of his favorite quotes.

For those that aren’t familiar with the HIWI project, the creators of this ambitious, quasi-tourism initiative asked Houstonians (and non-Houstonians alike) to submit a few lines to their website, telling the world why they loved Houston.  I thought long and hard about how best to describe my deep and abiding love for the city I was born and raised in, and which I lovingly call home.

And, in the end, I scrapped my original diatribe and just wrote this instead:

Because it’s my home. It’s in my blood and my lungs. Because I get lonely for the mercurial chaos and sprawl when I travel to sad, soulless, cookie-cutter towns. Everyone has a chance here; anyone can fit in and find a place of their own. No city in this country offers more diversity and opportunity alongside such friendliness and hospitality as Houston does.”

I was flattered to learn today that not only had my statement made it into the HIWI book, but it was also Tory’s “favorite” quote of the entire book.

Aw, shucks.

What can I say?  I love this place.

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Is it just me, or does this rather poorly worded Chronicle article suggest that violence and chaos have erupted on the mild, Ford Windstar-lined streets of Sugar Land?

Chaos erupting after assassination, Fort Bend man says

Barkat Charania, a Sugar Land resident and former president of the local Pakistani Chamber of Commerce, first heard about the assassination of Benazir Bhutto via a text message early today from his CEO heading a wholesale business operation in Karachi.

He turned on the news to confirm the chaos.

”The streets are already starting to get rough,” Charania said. ”It’s really not safe to go home.”

His 20 employees, who were reaching the end of their workday, planned to spend the night in their offices and reassess the situation in the morning. Protests and looting are expected to get worse.

This headline and associated-by-proximity photograph probably isn’t helping matters:


Just for clarification, although you may feel at times that you are actually in Pakistan or India while traveling through certain enclaves of the Sugar Land area, Sugar Land itself has not erupted into any kind of violence unless you count the after-Christmas sales at Off 5th and Talbots.

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From today’s riveting article: “UH film entries still win with proffesor (sic)”

I remain more convinced than ever that the Chronicle is like the vast wasteland where journalists who simply couldn’t cut it elsewhere end up, like T.S. Eliot’s straw men.

Also?  It couldn’t hurt to invest in a program that offers some kind of spell check.  Like some kind of professional word processing software; I’m sure that someone sells something like that.  Or even just a dictionary.  Do you remember those?  They’re books that have words in them, words that are spelled correctly.  You can get a whole set at Sam’s — dictionary AND thesaurus — for, like, five bucks.  It’s quite the steal.

Just a thought.

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While we’re on the topic of great local bloggers, Swamplot offers up a short-but-scathing satire of everything there is to hate about the Houston real estate and development market:

Here’s the problem with these sleek houses on full-acre lots in River Oaks: They’re selling for too damn cheap! The gorgeous land at the southern boundary of Memorial Park fronting Buffalo Bayou at 3840 Willowick — hogged by this eighties-modern home designed by New York architects Stonehill and Taylor — got swept up for between $45 and $57 a square foot at the end of August.

At that price, wouldn’t your head be spinning with the themed-towering-mansion possibilities? Bring on the demo and stucco crews!

Just look at all that useless non-air-conditioned space! What a waste! Look, you silly New York modernists, here’s the law in Houston: If you can’t enclose it, you can’t include it in your square-footage counts. And that means you can’t sell it.

Read the rest of the post here and see the pictures of the likely-to-be-demolished gem of a home that I would SHANK someone to live in.  Seriously.  I’d shank each and every one of you for this home.

Miserable stucco-house-building bastards.

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I’ve already thrown in my two cents on here regarding the excessive media coverage surrounding the Joe Horn case.  Many other Houston bloggers have, too.  But since we live in a city whose sole newspaper’s motto seems to be “If It Smells, It Sells,” you can expect that the media frenzy over this case won’t blow over any time soon.

With that in mind, Cory over at the Houston-oriented blog Lose An Eye, It’s A Sport calls out Lisa Falkenberg of the Houston Chronicle in his typically wry and hilarious manner (emphasis mine):

Yes Lisa, we know, it’s always about you. Just like it was in the red light sequencing case, the story in your eyes is not the story, but your eternal quest to stand alone as a martyr of reason in a backwater town, in a red State populated by the marginally educated. We get that, we understand it, and we thank you for reminding us in every column.

LaE has noted before that Ms. Falkenbergs opinion isn’t relevent here, it’s too bad that she seems to be intent on ramming it down our throats. Because of the hyperactive antics of Quannell X and the curious obsession of Lisa Falkenberg the Joe Horn story has lated five news cycles longer than it should have.

We have a justice system, and a set of laws, in Texas that are designed to deal with this case based on the facts, Texas doesn’t need the Chron’s newly minted opinion-writer to decide these matters, it’s done just fine for years without the advice of Houston’s self-obsessed red-head and the only person whose writing actually made people yearn for the return of Rick Casey.

If you’re at all interested in the Joe Horn case or just the lame state of Houston media in general, go check out the rest of the post here:  Lisa, Just Let It Go.

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The Houston Chronicle has linked to my humble little blog in their Opinion section today, which is amusing to me seeing as how I’ve never said one nice thing about their paper or their journalists.  Quite the opposite, actually.  Hell, I don’t even have anything decent to say about them in my other blog, which is devoted solely to food and really shouldn’t have cause to denigrate the local paper.  They just leave themselves so damn open to it.

But, uh…yeah…  Thanks for the traffic, I guess?  It doesn’t mean I’m going be nice, though.  🙂

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